**10 = 6 + 4**

Author: Frank Tony Smith

arXiv: hep-th/9908205**log(M_Pl/m_3/2)**

Authors: Oscar Loaiza-Brito, Johannes Martin, Hans Peter Nilles, Michael Ratz

arXiv: hep-th/0509158**Brane Big-Bang Brought by Bulk Bubble**

Authors: Uchida Gen, Akihiro Ishibashi, Takahiro Tanaka

Journal-ref: Phys.Rev. D66 (2002) 023519

arXiv: hep-th/0110286**The axis of evil**

Authors: Kate Land, Joao Magueijo

arXiv: astro-ph/0502237

Journal-ref: Phys.Rev.Lett. 95 (2005) 071301**Local Pancake Defeats Axis of Evil**

Authors: Chris Vale

arXiv: astro-ph/0509039**Why Eppley and Hannah's Experiment Isn't**

Author: James Mattingly

arXiv: gr-qc/0601127**A Fly in the SOUP**

Authors: R. Holman, L. Mersini-Houghton

arXiv: hep-th/0511112**Waking the Colored Plasma**

Authors: Jörg Ruppert, Berndt Müller

arXiv: hep-ph/0503158**Much ado about nothing: a treatise on empty and not-so-empty spacetimes**

Authors: Damien Martin

arXiv:gr-qc/0607022**Unhiggsing the del Pezzo**

Authors: Bo Feng, Sebastian Franco, Amihay Hanany, Yang-Hui He

arXiv: hep-th/0209228**The Sybils' Advice on Charm (and tau Leptons)**

Authors: I.I. Bigi

arXiv: hep-ph/0604038**X & Y**

Authors: L. Maiani, F. Piccinini, A.D. Polosa, V. Riquer

arXiv: hep-ph/0512082**New Regions for a Chameleon to Hide**

Authors: Baruch Feldman, Ann E. Nelson

arXiv: hep-ph/0603057**Cosmological Supersymmetry Breaking and the Power of the Pentagon: A Model of Low Energy Particle Physics**

Author: T. Banks

arXiv: hep-ph/0510159**Remodeling the Pentagon After the Events of 2/23/06**

Authors: T. Banks

arXiv: hep-ph/0606313**Cosmic Strings - Dead Again?**

Author: Mark Hindmarsh

arXiv: hep-ph/9806469**Brane New World**

Authors: S.W. Hawking, T. Hertog, H.S. Reall

Journal-ref: Phys.Rev. D62 (2000) 043501

arXiv: hep-th/0003052**Cloudshine: New Light on Dark Clouds**

Authors: Jonathan B. Foster, Alyssa A. Goodman

Journal-ref: Phys.Rev. D62 (2000) 043501

arXiv: astro-ph/0510624**The Skyrmion strikes back: baryons and a new large N_c limit**

Authors: Aleksey Cherman, Thomas D. Cohen

arXiv: hep-th/0607028**How Bob Laughlin Tamed the Giant Graviton from Taub-NUT space**

Authors: B.A.Bernevig, J. Brodie, L. Susskind, N. Toumbas

Journal-ref: JHEP 0102 (2001) 003

arXiv: hep-th/0010105**The Battle of Albuera, the FC Liverpool and the Standard Model**

Authors: I.I. Bigi

arXiv: hep-ph/0603087**Nutty Bubbles**

Authors: A.M. Ghezelbash, R.B. Mann

Journal-ref: JHEP 0209 (2002) 045

arXiv: hep-th/0207123**Nuttier Bubbles**

Authors: Dumitru Astefanesei, Robert B. Mann, Cristian Stelea

Journal-ref: JHEP 0601 (2006) 043

arXiv: hep-th/0508162**Deconstructing Noncommutativity with a Giant Fuzzy Moose**

Authors: Allan Adams, Michal Fabinger

Journal-ref: JHEP 0204 (2002) 006

arXiv: hep-th/0111079**Escape From The Menace Of The Giant Wormholes**

Authors: Sidney R. Coleman, Ki-Myeong Lee

Journal-ref: Phys. Lett. B 221:242,1989**Superbanana Orbits in Stellarator Geometries**

Authors: J. A. Derr, J. L. Shohet

Journal-ref: Phys. Rev. Lett. 43, 1730–1733 (1979)**The mother of all protocols: Restructuring quantum information's family tree**

Authors: Anura Abeyesinghe, Igor Devetak, Patrick Hayden, Andreas Winter

arXiv: quant-ph/0606225**Walking in the SU(N)**

Authors: Dennis D. Dietrich, Francesco Sannino

arXiv: hep-ph/0611341**Higgs Pain? Take a Preon!**

Authors: J.-J. Dugne, S. Fredriksson, J. Hansson, E. Predazzi

arXiv: hep-ph/9709227**The Matrix Reloaded - on the Dark Energy Seesaw**

Authors: Kari Enqvist, Steen Hannestad, Martin S. Sloth

arXiv: hep-ph/0702236**A New Dimension Hidden in the Shadow of a Wall**

Author: Nemanja Kaloper

arXiv: hep-th/0702206**Decapitating Tadpoles**

Authors: Allan Adams, John McGreevy, Eva Silverstein

arXiv: hep-th/0209226

Please note that I have not read most of the above papers, and I am not judging on the scientific content of these works.

Will be updated from time to time. Last update: Feb 28th 2007

## 35 comments:

I once gave a seminar at Santa Cruz entitled "Some Interesting Positions in the Kama Sutra of Topological Defects." Michael Dine introduced me, but refused to say the title out loud.

What about hep-th/0304224 which came out roughly the same time as the movie? Or hep-th/0010105? Many people use catchy seminar titles as those are more informal.

Hope you only read the titles, and not filled your Mind, with junk which then has to be sent to recycle bin.

Mind you, you know what they say: "Never Judge A Book by its cover"

Well, Tony (#1 in the list) is always around in the net, surely he will notice this thread. I think he was blacklisted from the arxiv after this title went out.

Great list!

Some of my favourites are titles with "phantom" in it, like:

Can dark energy evolve to the phantom?

(astro-ph/0407107)

Phantom dark energy, cosmic doomsday, and the coincidence problem.

(astro-ph/0410508)

Perhaps they are not so "stupid" because Phantom is an accepted name for the model. But try showing the titles to a non-physicist and then convincing him that physicists aren't nuts.

But the one that takes the cake (or is it the pancake?) is without a doubt:

Local pancake defeats axis of evil

(astro-ph/0509039)

How about http://arxiv.org/abs/physics/0312012

"String Theory, Universal Mind, and the Paranormal"

???

Dear Bee,

What is wrong with 10 = 6 + 4?

M-theory says 10 = 11 while QCD counts the gluon combinations as 3 x 3 = 8.

Perhaps my maths is obsolete.

Best wishes,

Anon

There are also titles which can be very misleading: for example, when scanning the arxive for information about dibaryons, I came across this paper:

hep-th/0305048:

Dibaryon SpectroscopyI may have been warned that it was in hep-th, but you can imagine that it was not exactly what I was looking for...

I I Bigi will be disappointed, his titles deserve to be in the list.

Hi Leuciopo, Hi Anon,

there is nothing

wrongwith 4+6 = 10 as far as I can see. I mean, as you say, it could have been worse, like Pi^2~10 or so. He was banned from the arXiv because of the TITLE of the paper?Hi anonymous,

I have not included any papers from the physics arxiv, there are too many with weird titles.

To the others: thanks! I have updated the list. I especially like the pancake :-)

Best,

B.

Particle physicists are obsessed with penguins,

http://www.mazepath.com/uncleal/bunny.htm

"Vicious mutant space alien nuclear holocaust penguin complicities," 17 references.

Either way, "mostly harmless."

I know you're all too young to remember, but "Escape from the Menace of the Giant Wormholes" (Coleman and Lee, 1989) really does deserve a spot. Those were the days.

Tom Banks again - hep-th/0211160

Heretics of the false vacuum: Gravitational effects on and of vacuum decay. 2.

Presumably: Return of the Heretics! He has copied the sensible part of the title from Coleman-de Luccia.

Also, I vividly remember a sentence from an abstract of a paper:

"The Killing fields are on the horizon"

which makes perfect sense in differential geometry! But I can't find the preprint any more.

This from today's arxiv:

hep-ph/0607062 [abs, ps, pdf, other] :

Title: An AdS/CFT Calculation of Screening in a Hot Wind

Authors: Hong Liu, Krishna Rajagopal, Urs Achim Wiedemann

Oh gee, another one!

hep-th/0607031 [abs, ps, pdf, other] :

Title: SUSY Moose Runs and Hops: An extra dimension from a broken deformed CFT

Authors: Joshua Erlich, Jong Anly Tan (College of William and Mary)

You missed my favourite:

http://arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0111079

Deconstructing Noncommutativity with a Giant Fuzzy Moose

I submit:

http://arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0207123

Nutty Bubbles

Authors: A.M. Ghezelbash, R.B. Mann

and

http://arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0508162

Nuttier Bubbles

Authors: Dumitru Astefanesei, Robert B. Mann, Cristian Stelea

Here's one:

Superbanana Orbits in Stellarator GeometriesPhys. Rev. Lett. 43, 1730–1733 (1979)

J. A. Derr and J. L. Shohet

And for 'anon' above: 3x3 = 8+1 in QCD. The octet and singlet representations.

I found a new one today at Dave Beacon's blog:

The mother of all protocols: Restructuring quantum information's family tree

http://arxiv.org/abs/quant-ph/0606225

The article by Tom Banks listed above:

Remodeling the Pentagon After the Events of 2/23/06

is the best, because he also choses the titles of some sections appropriately :)

A Fat Higgs with a Fat Top

Spacetime and vacuum as seen from Moscow

GZK Violation - a Tempest in a (Magnetic) Teapot?

These don't sound half as bad as some of the ones you read in biology journals. Make you cringe.

Have a stupid question though, do the journals decide the titles or are the authors left to come up with these sparkling gems themselves.

pipettemonkey,

I've not work in hep-th, but my experience in general physics is that the authors choose the titles. The editors may of course suggest revisions there as with elsewhere in the paper, of course.

I love "Deconstructing Noncommutativity with a Giant Fuzzy Moose," hep-th/0111079. Can someone say whether it's a joke or not? The authors clearly have a sense of humor (see the Acknowledgements) but I can't tell whether it's an actual impenetrable string theory paper, or just poking fun at same.

It's a Gluino! :)

Two more submissions to this list:

Neutrinos in a Sterile Throat

The Axis of Evil revisited

http://arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0209226

decapitating tadpoles

Ha! I just saw this thread and it's pretty funny! Us authors choose our own titles and we have great fun doing so. My favorite from one of my papers was "Warped Phenomenology," hep-ph/9909255. The journal made us change the title to "Phenomenology of the Randall-Sundrum Gauge Hierarchy Model," which doesn't quite have the same ring to it...

Looking at today's arxiv, I notice that we had a new candidate for the stupid title list bestowed upon us:

"A New Dimension Hidden in the Shadow of a Wall"

There was a whole fad of these for a while:. Off the top of my head, I remember (some more so than others)

http://www.arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0107172

http://www.arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0011125

http://www.arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0008205

http://www.arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0107199

http://www.arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0003163

http://www.arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0107088

http://www.arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0104010

http://www.arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0502021

http://www.arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0003075

http://www.arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0506130

http://www.arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0404084

http://www.arxiv.org/abs/hep-th/0108075

There are plenty of others I'm probably forgetting. (And I hope the spam catcher doesn't eat this.)

Rumsfeld Hadrons

Abstract:

"Donald Rumsfeld, in attempting to excuse the inexcusable, once (in)famously said that ``there are things that we know we know; there are things that we know we don't know; and then there are things that we don't know that we don't know". Recent discoveries about hadrons with heavy flavours fall into those categories. It is of course the third category that is the most tantalising, but lessons from the first two may help resolve the third."

How To Kill a Penguin

Ulrich Haisch

(Submitted on 23 Jun 2007)

Abstract: Within constrained minimal-flavor-violation the large destructive flavor-changing Z-penguin managed to survive eradication so far. We give a incisive description of how to kill it using the precision measurements of the Z -> b anti-b pseudo observables. The derived stringent range for the non-standard contribution to the universal Inami-Lim function C leads to tight two-sided limits for the branching ratios of all Z-penguin dominated flavor-changing K- and B-decays.

You probably think this paper's about you: narcissists' perceptions of their personality and reputation.

New particles or "Why I believe in quarks"

Every time a physicist says "I don't believe in quarks," somewhere a quark dies.

Total recoil: the maximum kick from nonspinning black-hole binary inspiral:

http://arxiv.org/abs/gr-qc/0610154

Turduckening black holes: an analytical and computational study:

http://arxiv.org/abs/0809.3533

Excision without excision: the relativistic turducken:

http://arxiv.org/abs/0707.3101

Check the author list on

http://arxiv.org/abs/hep-ph/9306225

Wally Greenberg says that T.V. stands for "The Very".

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